4 Ways to Make Solo Sex More Exciting

Marianne Brandon Ph.D.
The Future of Intimacy

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SEX

Amp up your private practice with these creative tips.

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KEY POINTS

• Many people find solo sex a more efficient path to pleasure than partnered sex.
• Just as with partnered sex, people get into “sexual ruts” when masturbating.
• Masturbation can be a reward after a long day, a pleasant distraction, or even a sleep aid.

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Let’s face it: Masturbation gets a bad rap. Even though surveys suggest it’s a popular pastime, people hate to acknowledge that they pleasure themselves. Masturbation seems to be paired with sexual shame, and many hold the attitude that people only masturbate because they don’t have the option for partnered sex. That’s too bad, since masturbation offers the ultimate in safe sex – particularly important given recent political developments. Plus, for many people, masturbation is more pleasurable than partnered sex: You know exactly what touch feels best, and you are less distracted by a partner’s needs and reactions. Masturbation is an adaptable, multi-purpose activity; it’s not just for sexual pleasure anymore. Masturbation can be a reward after a long day, a distraction from stress, a sleep aid, or just a way to pass the time when the movie you are watching is lame.

Popular accompaniments to solo love include porn and sex toys. But as with all types of sex, the same routines get boring after a while. If you find yourself stuck in a solo sex rut, here are four ideas to make your solo sex great again.

1. Invest in VR glasses. VR porn takes voyeurism to entirely new heights. Yes, VR glasses can be pricey, but consider this an investment in your sexual health. Rather than watching porn on your computer screen, VR glasses place you right in the middle of the action. According to Pornhub, VR porn is becoming increasingly popular. That’s good news, because the more popular it becomes, the wider the variety of experiences await you.
2. Make an evening of it. Rather than just getting the job done, consider turning your solo practice into a multi-sensory creative practice. Experiment with different sensations, such as the feel of satin, fur, or feathers on your body. See how different kinds of music impact your perceptions. Try out different positions and explore how they impact physical sensations. This is a great opportunity for self-sex ed. Take your time and savor the experience.
3. Investigate the latest sex apps. Innovations in sex tech mean that new sex apps, with novel capabilities, are regularly released. No longer is porn the only game in town. There are apps for sexting unknown others, apps for having simulated sex with an avatar of your creation, and apps to appeal to whatever kink piques your curiosity. Of course, it’s important to be mindful of confidentiality issues, but this can be a fascinating way to explore experiences that you may not be willing to try with a human partner.
4. Upgrade your vibrator. Vibrators come in all shapes and sizes, with almost as many options as an electric car. You can find vibrators that measure your orgasm, vibrate to the beat of music, or have photographic capability. The sex toy industry is booming, and inventors are highly motivated to design innovative creations that aim to please. And after all, even adults need toys and playtime.

Solo sex can be a brilliant way to spice up your sex life, and it helps you develop useful skills that can enhance your partnered sexual experiences. Safe sex has never been sexier.